Drinking Quotes and Sayings
Beer, the cause of and solution to, all life’s problems.
Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic’s best friend!
I would like to make a toast to lying, stealing, cheating and drinking. If you’re going to lie, lie for a friend. If you’re going to steal, steal a heart. If your going to cheat, cheat death. And if you’re going to drink, drink with me.
Kissing is like drinking salted water: you drink and your thirst increases.
You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
An alcoholic is someone you don’t like who drinks as much as you do.
Beer is not a good cocktail-party drink, especially in a home where you don’t know where the bathroom is.
One can drink too much, but one never drinks enough.
The worse thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober.
Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them.
He was a wise man who invented beer.
I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.
Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.
I drink to make other people interesting.
You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline; It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
Time is never wasted when you’re wasted all the time.
If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs.
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.
I take a whiskey drink
I take a chocolate drink
and when I have to pee
I use the kitchen sink.
This is kidnapping! People are gonna know I’m missing. There is a liquor store I go to every morning.
This is the stage we call, “Professor Barney” — talkative, coherent, even insightful. Here’s drunk Barney!
Here’s to alcohol, a never-ending source of humor and absurdity. Peter and Brian are often at their best when inebriated.
Oh Mother dear, I’m over here
and I’m never coming back.
What keeps me here is the Beer,
the Women and the Craic!
Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.
My Grandmother is over eighty and still doesn’t need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
[Water is] the only drink for a wise man.
It is better to hide ignorance, but it is hard to do this when we relax over wine.
Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
Beer will always have a definite role in the diet of an individual and can be considered a cog in the wheel of nutritional foods.
And I wish his soul in heaven may dwell, Who first invented this leathern bottel!
What harm in drinking can there be, Since punch and life so well agree?
The water was not fit to drink. To make it palatable, we had to add whiskey. By diligent effort, I learned to like it.
call senses - of a man, so that he can drink in all the harmonies of that…”
Don’t smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We’re…”
A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches fifty, and a fool if he doesn’t drink afterward.
Whiskey and beer are all right in their place, but their place is in hell. The saloon hasn’t one leg to stand on.
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